For James on his second birthday

For James 8th August 2011

Oh James, my wonderful, beautiful, lovely James! Today is your second birthday. You’re really growing up now and becoming a little boy. Barely any baby left in you!

To celebrate your birthday we went to Cotswold Wildlife Park on Saturday and also had a little party for you at home with Grandma and Grumpy and Auntie Julia and Uncle Gary on Sunday. The Sylvs were with us for the whole weekend too, and joining the party at CWP were Auntie Sevim, Uncle Chris, Isabella and Melissa. We bought you a play kitchen (which you LOVE!) with a cooker, fridge, sink, washing machine, ironing board, the lot! We also got you a little float jacket for swimming – I guess we’ll try that out next week with you. Hope it has more success than the armbands! (Which, in case you are wondering, you categorically and vocally refused to wear when we tried them last time at the pool!)

Words cannot express how utterly proud your Daddy and I are of you. Everything you do fills our hearts with joy. (Well, nearly everything… you are after all entering the terrible twos, so are prone to the occasional irrational tantrum, accompanied by headbutting and biting!) You are learning to speak and every new word makes us squeal with pleasure. You know the word ‘blue’ although you pronounce it ‘boo’, which frankly makes my heart melt! You can also say ‘choo choo’ for train. You picked your own Thomas the Tank Engine birthday cake at Sainsburys – pointing to it and saying ‘choo choo’! You loved blowing the candles out on it yesterday. We had to relight them a couple of times!

What else can I tell you about who you are at the moment?

You particularly like Fireman Sam. In fact you are quite addicted to it, which is a shame as there are only 50 or so episodes constantly on repeat on ‘Cartoonito’, so Mummy is getting a little bit bored of watching it over and over. Mummy’s own fault really for letting you get into telly in the first place.

You seem to be slightly less interested in books of an evening and would rather climb onto the windowsill and look out of the window at the world outside. Daddy says you take after him in this – that he would always be looking out of the window as a child.

You love being in the ‘big bed’ when we read stories ahead of bedtime and you love to get under the covers and be a big boy. I think you’re pretty ready to move out of your cot really, but Daddy and I are worried that you just won’t stay in the bed when there are no bars to keep you there. We’ll have to take the plunge eventually though, won’t we!

Food wise, you still only have quite a small appetite, so you don’t eat huge amounts. Sausages are usually a winner with you, as are crisps and chocolate! Otherwise, you’ve actually got pretty healthy tastes. You especially like tomatoes, cucumber, olives, dill pickles (!), sweetcorn, pine nuts, strawberries, bananas and grapes. I wonder if you will still like all these things when you are reading this many years from now, or whether you’ll have developed more of a liking for McDonalds! (Will McDonalds even exist in the future …? Probably, evil empire that it is!)

You love bath time with Daddy! He always tickles you when he’s getting you dried off and every night I can hear you giggling as he pretends to bite your tummy! Daddy makes you go and put your dirty clothes in the basket by yourself, which you do perfectly. You’re very tidy, actually – you always put your yoghurt pots into the bin by yourself. And you like to be helpful – you try to help me hang out the washing on the drying racks for example!

When I’m in the kitchen I lift you onto the side and you watch me doing chopping and peeling etc. You love the kettle but know that you are not to touch it. ‘Hot’ was one of your first words, so you point at the kettle, the toaster and the gas hob and say ‘hot, hot’ very wisely to me! We have this small brown bin for food waste on the counter and you like to sit on it and eat some nibbles or drink some water as I am getting your dinner ready.

Finally (for this entry at least), you love playing in the park – especially going on the big slides! And you love football. You’re pretty good at it for a 2 year old, I think. Great ball control! Any sporting prowess you have comes from either your Daddy or Grumpy, who was a pretty nifty rugby player in his youth!

I don’t know if you understand yet that you have a little brother or sister coming. I think you understand a lot more than we sometimes give you credit for, but as you don’t speak much yet it’s difficult to tell. I want you to know that I will never love you any less, even when I have another baby to share my heart. You will always be my special little first born. You will always be my lovely, good-natured, sweet, loving little boy. You will always mean more to me that anything else in the entire world (along with your daddy and new brother/sister).

You are a wonderfully affectionate child – always ready with a kiss and a hug for everyone. It makes my heart break to leave you at nursery, especially on a Monday (which today is) after we’ve had such a lovely weekend together. Mind you, with the energy you have, it’s probably a good thing that I get a rest at work! Speaking of work, I had really better get on with some, so I’ll sign off.

All my love always!
Mummy x

Why I'm worried about Troops for Teachers

I have nothing at all against former service personel becoming teachers. If they have the desire and the aptitude, why not? They have as much right to enter the teaching profession as everyone else. What worries me slightly, however, about the government policy of actively recruiting servicemen and women into the profession - and indeed providing funding to make it happen - is why it is necessary ? Why, in the first place is there such a shortage of teachers? And why does the government feel that soldiers are the best people to fill this gap? My worry is that the second question pretty much answers the first. Has teaching today become as much about managing a classroom or unruly kids as it is about educating?

Teaching has one of the highest drop-out rates of any profession - partly due to the enormous mountains of admin teachers need to do in addition to their day-jobs - and partly due to the stresses and strains of dealing with children who for whatever reason lack any respect for their authority. To be fair, we're probably only talking about a handful in any class - but of course, they will be the kids who set the bar for the lesson. What we need to look at is why teachers (and the police, and any other adult for that matter) command so little respect in today's society.

I honestly don't think it's all about the parents. I have a very good friend who's child has gone off the rails to the point that he was recently permanently excluded from school. Her other children are fine. She and her husband are not only law-abiding, hard-working citizens - they are models of the 'Big Society' - both volunteering with children's organisations. The 'problem child' kept getting into trouble because he refused to accept authority/ At 13 felt that he was grown up enough to govern his own life fully. Rules he viewed as petty (of which there are many at school to keep control of the masses!) such as uniform restrictions enraged him. Why should he??

I don't know what the answer is, and sadly, nor does my friend. She is unable to get through to her son, despite trying incredibly hard. There's a lot of talk in the press about increasing depression and mental health issues in young people brought on by sedentary lifestyles and early academic pressure. And it does seem to me that not every child is cut out for academic studies. Which is not at all to say that they aren't bright or capable of learning. Simply that they may not have an interest in all of the subjects they are taught at school. The new 14-19 curriculum does seem to address this to an extent, and the government is talking about doubling the number of apprenticeship postions available over the next couple of years. This may take care of quite a few of the trouble-makers at GCSE and beyond.

For the rest though, perhaps a bit of military discipline is what is needed. I don't argue with that at all. I'm simply sad that we've somehow got into this position.